Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Loving Your Heater

Gallery watcher, Arun Raman, received this flyer from PSEG Energy:

I think this woman is a little too excited about her water heater. Notice how closely she presses up against it. Hmmmm.....

Thanks, Arun!

Monday, November 29, 2010

S"outher'n Co"ok'in"

Traveling back from the Indiana over the weekend, we stopped off in Forrest City, Arkansas, and there had dinner at the Ole Sawmill Cafe.

The down-home southern cooking was fine, but the quotation mark usage left a lot to be desired.

Annoying J. Crew Model of the Week - 11/29/10

The Annoying J. Crew Model for the week of November 29th:


Oh! It's just so hard being a J. Crew model.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Crazy Coffee Capers

Brewing up goodness that you can almost taste...it's another installment of

RETRO-ADTIVITY

As we come out the backside of Thanksgiving week, let's experience the heartfelt joy of this 1938 ad:

Anyone care to guess what that man's really doing with his coffee cup?

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Of Turkeys and Fabric

Just like that cranberry sauce congealing in the back of your fridge, some things just taste better as leftovers. Same, too, with this week's installment of

RETRO-ADTIVITY

Here's an advertisement that appeared in Seventeen in 1967:

The pierced turkeys in the background really make the sell.

Friday, November 26, 2010

Freaky Target Girl

Each year, I dislike the holiday season just a little more than I did the year before. This time around, it's the freaky Target woman who is causing me great pain. In commercials that have flooded cable, she's shown in exercise clothes, in training for a Target shopping spree on Black Friday, as soon as the doors open. These ads are even infecting the Webosphere:
What could be more moronically and irritating than helping to further anchor the holidays to consumer spending?

Answer: this woman's expression.

Like mother, like daughter. Think about it, won't you?

Nick's, the "Fresh"-Maker

Let's all give "thanks" for proper quotation usage.

See more quotable quandaries in the Don't "Quote" Me on That special feature.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving

HAPPY THANKSGIVING
from the Gallery of the Absurd!


Now go run out and buy something.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Fowl Headwear

This year we can give thanks to the latest consumer monstrosity: a turkey hat.

The depressing part is that I've seen people wearing these...and I mean "people" as in plural.

Remember, "Fun styles!"

Much thanks to Ryan Hennessy who found this ad in a Christmas Tree Shops circular.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Roady Rage

More fun from our time on the road over the weekend. While stopping at an Indiana rest area, I saw this message from the state's Department of Transportation, featuring that cute and bubbly hardhatted steel drum that we all love, Roady:
Go ahead. Take a good, long, close look at Roady:
Makes you wonder if the contents of his steel-drum body isn't something toxic.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Tanks for the Freedom

I was on the road this weekend, and stopping at a Marathon gas station, I saw this sign:

Hasn't our country's manic over-reliance on oil actually ended up curtailing our freedom?

Annoying J. Crew Model of the Week - 11/22/10

It's time to give thanks to the Annoying J. Crew Model for the week of November 22nd.


What the hell kind of dance is this?

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Serving that Inner Indian in You

Circle your wagons, it's another Thanksgiving installment of

RETRO-ADTIVITY

A Banquet Frozen Dinner ad from 1963:
A comforting message for conservatives pining for the good ol' days. It's good to know that some racial stereotypes just haven't gone out of style.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Bless our Beans

The holiday season is upon us, so let's give thanks to this week's

RETRO-ADTIVITY


Nothing says Thanksgiving more than real Boston baked beans.

Hey, where are the Indians in this ad?

Friday, November 19, 2010

No Time to Watch


Quite an unfortunate name for a watch store, don't you think?

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Freud Toy

Scene from a toy store:

Curious, isn't it, that a phallic-shaped toy marketed to boys should be presented at this angle with some projectile shooting from its tip? Who would have thought?

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Great White Hope

Another commercial from Korean Air. This one apparently filmed in the Land of Anglo Giants.
Curious, isn't it, that the white people in this commercial are all giants, striding over the land they're comfortable dominating, while those serving them--the mostly Korean stewardesses--are shown with marvelous gams.

Low Energy

Here's an image from a mail flyer I received from Reliant Energy:
There's a thin, thin line between cute and annoying.
Reliant has crossed it.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Drool Frog


Frogs with glandular problems, and for only $59.99!

Thanks to Alan Peschke, who has once again provided the Gallery with quality advertising crap.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Annoying J. Crew Model of the Week - 11/15/10

The Annoying J. Crew Model of the Week. Ta Da!!

For this time of the season, I thought a football-themed image was in order:

His open mouth really, really frightens me.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Robert Wagner, No!

Put on your favorite music, it's time for this week's

RETRO-ADTIVITY

Here's a listing from the garment industry rag, Impressions, from around 1980:
This guy's a little too proud of his CD, don't you think?

Thanks to Thom Graff for sending me this funky ad for the original Gallery.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Ashes to Ashes

An auto body shop in north Dallas:

I'm tempted to think that the shape of this body shop sign was intentionally made to look like a coffin. Or is this giving the owners too much credit?

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Hot Roddin' It

Something from a recent Bits and Pieces catalog:

Product ads like this really do depress me.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Fanny's Moist, Sticky Muffin

A contemporary advertisement, but one referencing an older commercial:

There's more I could say here, but I'll refrain.

Thanks to Gallery die-hard, Dave Carvell, for another spot-on contribution.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Annoying J. Crew Model of the Week - 11/8/10

Oh happy day! It's the Annoying J. Crew Model for the week of November 8th:


Chet, the anguished J. Crew model.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Jungle Jesus

It being Sunday, perhaps it's a good time to share with you a recent find at the Hobby Lobby:


Thanks again to Kathy Deasy Wirtes, the Gallery's Colorado Bureau Chief.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Mr. Leggs Goes to Sensitivity School

Get out your pipe and Hefner-inspired smoking jacket, it's time for this week's

RETRO-ADTIVITY

Misogyny has never been so wacky!


Thursday, November 4, 2010

Facehole Ad

Yet another head-scratching ad found on Facebook:

Okay, I get the whole "bosshole" thing and the advertiser suggesting you start your own business. But what's the deal with this bald Freddie Mercury dude? What does he have to do with the product?

Maybe we should call people who put up these kind of incongruous ads on social networking sites "Faceholes."

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Clown Time Is Over

Here some stale eye candy left over from Halloween:


Ah, the power of clowns!


I'm not sure which is more frightening, the clown's image or the words "I'm back!" right above his head.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Annoying J. Crew Model of the Week - 11/1/10

The Annoying J. Crew Model for the week of November 1st:


White, anemic, anorexic...your J. Crew model, ladies and gentlemen! Your J. Crew model.

Changing LINKS