Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Banging the Clown

Clown aficionados may be familiar with an advertisement that has appeared on a few other blogs, one for "Sally Bangs, the Clown." The lack of comma in this ad makes you wonder if Sally actually is a clown, or if instead she has a particular, greasepainted fetish.
And if you're wondering if this curiously worded ad is too good to be true, just look it up yourself on a business search site such as Yelp:
Lancaster, South Carolina's kinky little secret.

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Not Humorous

I was in a store today and came across this box of Good Humor ice cream in the freezer section:
The packaging seems innocent enough--made even more so by the warm and fuzzy "Good Humor" brand name--but there's something more sinister brewing beneath the cake-coated goodness of this product. Take a look at the iconic Good Humor dude:

Why does this man look so happy holding up a bar of ice cream? How exactly might he be associated with "the taste you love"? And why are his eyes closed? If you really think about this image, it starts to get spooky.

Monday, March 26, 2012

Annoying J. Crew Model of the Week - 3/26/12

Presenting the Annoying J. Crew Model for the week of March 26th:


Yeah, I often put on a suit to walk around in the great outdoors.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

That Ten High Smile

What's funnier than a clown with a serious drinking problem? Why, this week's installment of

RETRO-ADTIVITY

A Vintage advertisement for Ten High bourbon whiskey:
This ad is disturbing on a variety of levels, not the least of which is the expression on this clown's face. Let's take a closer look, shall we?
I don't know about you, but after seeing this image I won't be able to sleep in a dark room for at least another week.

Friday, March 23, 2012

The Smell of Tim McGraw

I was horrified to see this product in a local drugstore:

Nothing like splashing yourself with the odor of a sweaty country music singer.

Think about it: what does it take to earn the right to be smellified?

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Boney Legs

I found this image in the most recent issue of Diamond's Previews catalog, under the "toys and statues" section:

I know that with busts like this, you don't have the entire body, but instead, the top half or torso sitting on a stand. The thing is, the stand that McCoy's torso rests on looks somewhat like legs, short and stubby legs with flat square feet.

Annoying J. Crew Model of the Week - 3/19/12

I present to you the Annoying J. Crew Model(s) for the week of March 19th.

I've always disliked the way that clothiers, especially J. Crew, uses kids in their ads.

The way they pose and present them, it's like J. Crew wants us to hate children.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Republican Wife

With the right-wing's current framing of womanhood in mind, let's look down on this week's installment of

RETRO-ADTIVITY

I wonder if Rick Santorum ever bought Pep for his wife?
Actually, this advertisement sort of sounds drug-related, doesn't it?

Friday, March 16, 2012

Better Off Ted

There's only one way to follow up the inanity of Snookie: Ted Nuget. Yep, that's right, Mr. Cat Scratch Fever turned asswipe for conservative causes. I saw this sign in a gas station I visited today, and I immediately got diarrhea:
Why? Why? Why?!

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Baby's in Blah

A vending machine at a grocery store here in Kearney, NE:
I guess now "Team Snooki" includes her ill-fated unborn child.

There's really nothing more I can say about the idiotic extent to which some cultural phenomenons--and some merchandisers--will go.

Monday, March 12, 2012

Annoying J. Crew Model of the Week - 3/12/12

Filled with sweet, nougaty goodness, it's the Annoying J. Crew Model for the week of March 12th.


Most J. Crew female models have that emaciated look as it is, but this one is trying to make herself look even thinner by standing so erect, as if she has a stick inserted somewhere.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Drink Up the Fear

Time to get all juiced up for this week's installment of

RETRO-ADTIVITY

Yesterday I featured a clown-related advertisement, so in keeping with that horrifying theme, I present to you the Bluebird grape juice clown:
To get the full impact of this image, let's take a close look at that face:


Hope everyone is able to sleep well tonight!

Friday, March 2, 2012

"Fun" with Li'l John

It would be difficult to top the creepy factor generated by Lemmy, yesterday's Gallery entry. But I think this just might do the trick:


And with this image...Have a happy Friday!

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Lemmy

My good friend, Brian Donahue, send this to me:

There's something about Lemmy's face that disturbs me. Just looking at it makes me piss my pants.

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